Basic Dialectics

“Rabbi,” the man said, “Explain the Talmud to me.”

“Very well,” he said. “First, I will ask you a question. If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty, and one comes out clean, which one washes himself?”

“The dirty one,” answers the man.

“No. They look at each other and the dirty man thinks he is clean and the clean man thinks he is dirty, therefore, the clean man washes himself.”

“Now, another question:
If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty, and one comes out clean, which one washes himself?”

The man smiles and says, “You just told me, Rabbi. The man who is clean washes himself because he thinks he is dirty.”

“No,” says the Rabbi. “If they each look at themselves, the clean man knows he doesn’t have to wash himself, so the dirty man washes himself.”

“Now, one more question.
If two men climb up a chimney and one comes out dirty, and one comes out clean, which one washes himself?”

“I don’t know, Rabbi. Depending on your point of view, it could be either one.”

Again the Rabbi says, “No. If two men climb up a chimney, how could one man remain clean? They both are dirty, and they both wash themselves.”

The confused man said, “Rabbi, you asked me the same question three times and you gave me three different answers. Is this some kind of a joke?”

“This is not a joke, my son. This is Talmud.”

Communism stole my virginity (and I won’t shed a tear)

Listen!

Look what they done to me: I never really had the chance
to grow up in naivety and to merely believe
Look what they done to me: I never really had the chance
to think it’ll all work out just like that
cuz

Communism stole my virginity and I won’t shed a tear
It fucked my brain and opened my eyes, no I won’t shed no tear

There was no Fall and no apple to show me Evil and Good
to show the road to Salvation, to make me do what I should
they rolled the Apple of Discord that made me understand
there is no Good and no Evil, there’s only what we plan
yeah

Communism stole my virginity and I won’t shed a tear
It fucked my brain and opened my eyes, no I won’t shed no tear

Ignoring the world doesn’t make me feel better
all my lovin’ won’t calm me down
I’ll never think our current platform
is as far as we can get
cuz

Communism stole my virginity and I won’t shed a tear
It fucked my brain and opened my eyes, no I won’t shed no tear

Samples “communist anarchist” and “voluntary association” taken from an interview with Robert Anton Wilson